To invite children or not to your wedding and how do you make it clear?


‘Should I invite children to my wedding?’   ‘How do I make it clear children are not invited?’  

These are questions that I am asked regularly as a Wedding Planner (SJD Events Limited) and how best to advise the guests of the children policy.  

It is a hard call as I think at a wedding children can be great but it can be an extremely long day for them so you need to consider entertainment as they are not going to be able to sit through a 2 1/2 hour wedding breakfast and speeches.   If you want little ones as bridesmaids or page boys that is fine but factor in boredom too especially in church and usually a small packet of sweets or a small bribe of a gift at the end works a treat.

To avoid confusion I always advice that couples should put the children policy on the information sheet with the invitation so it is clear.

If you have friends with children then I always say pick up the phone and explain the situation.   And, if you have friends with babies that is fine but explain the format of the day and that it is tight on the tables so they won’t be able to bring the pram into the wedding breakfast.   Also, specify if guests needs high chairs as not all venues have them and can charge.    Think a pram /high chair is a space at the table. 

When writing the invitation you need to be specific so I would suggest just writing Mr and Mrs John Adams or John and Claire and then if you want kids it would be Mr and Mrs John Adams and family or John, Claire, Miles and Susan.

However, if you opt for children you do need to consider that it is a long day and their attention span is not the same as a grown up.

My tip to couples having children at a wedding is ensure you arrange some entertainment for them however a magician isn’t always the way as not all magicians can offer children and adult magic.    So, either consider a nanny or entertainers such as Make A Wish who are brilliant.

This element of the wedding may not have been built into the budget but trust me it is the answer for enjoying yourselves and not resenting the children attending.

Over the past few years I have noticed people not covering the children and have found myself becoming the children’s entertainer during dinner which is fine as I used to be a teacher and I want to ensure my clients have a great day but for a couple of hundred pounds you can get cover and then your friends enjoy themselves.

Check out Make a Wish at

About sjdeventsltd

Owner of a Consultancy Company, specialising in offering flexible services for all types of events, including fundraising projects in the charity sector.
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